{"id":23913,"date":"2015-05-18T20:20:10","date_gmt":"2015-05-18T20:20:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/?p=23913"},"modified":"2015-05-18T20:20:10","modified_gmt":"2015-05-18T20:20:10","slug":"dorel-schor-literatura","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/2015\/05\/18\/dorel-schor-literatura\/","title":{"rendered":"Dorel Schor: Literatur\u0103"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\"\"<\/a> –\u00a0 schi\u021b\u0103 umoristic\u0103 –<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0Cu toate c\u0103 Leopold Gurni\u015ft e un om foate simpatic, discu\u0163iile noastre sunt destul de banale \u015fi nu deosebit de cuprinz\u0103toare. Leopold este, de felul lui, o persoan\u0103 modest\u0103 \u015fi taciturn\u0103. De data asta \u00eens\u0103 ne-a vizitat pu\u0163in\u0103 vreme dup\u0103 ce doamna Gurni\u015ft abia plecase de la noi. Doamna, ca s\u0103 respect\u0103m adev\u0103rul, ne acordase cu larghe\u0163e c\u00e2teva ore bune din timpul ei \u015fi m\u0103 \u00eentrebam, amuzat dar \u015fi plictisit, dac\u0103 va trebui s\u0103-mi petrec \u00eentreaga zi \u00een compania cuplului, pe… fragmente.<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– Tocmai a plecat doamna dumitale! i-am spus politicos, dar rezervat.<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– \u015etiu, \u015ftiu…, a f\u0103cut el discret. De aia am venit.<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0Mi-am exprimat, mai mult prin gesturi, nedumerirea.<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– S-a \u00eent\u00e2mplat ceva?<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– Depinde, a oftat Leopold. O s\u0103-\u0163i explic…<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0L-am poftit s\u0103 ia loc \u015fi iat\u0103 ce mi-a explicat domnul Leopold Gurni\u015ft.<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– \u015etii c\u0103 Matilda vorbe\u015fte \u015fapte limbi \u015fi ruse\u015fte. \u015ei c\u0103 este o cititoare pasionat\u0103. De c\u00e2nd l-am logodit pe b\u0103iat are mai mult timp liber \u015fi, dac\u0103 nu cro\u015feteaz\u0103, ce s\u0103 fac\u0103 dup\u0103 amiezele? Cite\u015fte. \u00cen c\u00e2teva limbi…<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– \u015ei eu i-am \u00eemprumutat uneori.<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– \u015etiu, \u015ftiu…, m-a asigurat d\u00e2nsul. De aia am venit. Matilda e o fiin\u0163\u0103 foarte sensibil\u0103. \u015ei influen\u0163abil\u0103!\u00a0 C\u00e2nd a citit cum a murit \u00eemp\u0103r\u0103teasa Sisi, a pl\u00e2ns o s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103 \u015fi nici nu a g\u0103tit, am m\u00e2ncat numai iaurt \u015fi sendviciuri cu marmelad\u0103. \u00cemi amintesc c\u0103 alt\u0103dat\u0103 a \u00eemprumutat de la Rozica lui Mena\u015fe o carte de bucate \u00eentitulat\u0103 “Buc\u0103t\u0103ria exotic\u0103”. Nu m\u0103 \u00eentreba ce perioad\u0103 neagr\u0103 a urmat. Era decis\u0103 s\u0103-mi preg\u0103teasc\u0103 coad\u0103 de crocodil, stridii \u00een sos de ananas, pulpe de broa\u015fte, ficat de g\u00e2sc\u0103 cu mirodenii rodeziene, ou\u0103 de stru\u0163, ciuperci cu sos de Andaluzia…<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– Ce-i asta?<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– De unde s\u0103 \u015ftiu? M-a costat o mul\u0163ime de parale, am m\u00e2ncat ca dracu’, m\u0103 durea burta \u015fi regretam marmelada. Dup\u0103 ai, cineva i-a dat cartea cu note de drum \u00eentitulat\u0103 “Hai hui prin Europa”. Nu s-a l\u0103sat p\u00e2n\u0103 ce nu am plecat \u00eentr-o excursie organizat\u0103 prin toate capitalele \u015fi n-a vizitat toate muzeele \u015fi toate magazinele continentului \u015fi, poate n-o s\u0103 m\u0103 crezi, a \u00eenceput un jurnal de c\u0103l\u0103torie cu impresii, pre\u0163uri, re\u0163ete culinare, biografii de pictori \u015fi arhitec\u0163i, date ale b\u0103t\u0103liilor, starea vremii, \u00a0buticuri \u015fi adrese ale unor cucoane din grup.<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– \u00cen\u0163eleg, am rostit cu triste\u0163e.<\/p>\n

\u00a0– Nu mai spun ce probleme am avut cu ea dup\u0103 ce a citit “Memoriile unui milionar”. A trebuit s\u0103 fiu un mare diplomat ca s\u0103 scap numai cu tapete \u00een salon, un lan\u0163 de duble, trei perechi de pantofi italiene\u015fti \u015fi o sear\u0103 la un restaurant chinezesc. O adev\u0103rat\u0103 risip\u0103, absolut inutil\u0103. A urmat o perioad\u0103 de acalmie…<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– Tot e bine…<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– A\u015fa crezi. De parc\u0103 nu dumneata i-ai \u00eemprumutat “Decameronul” lui Boccacio. \u015ei \u00eenc\u0103 \u00een dou\u0103 volume… Nu m\u0103 \u00eentreba ce serviciu mi-ai f\u0103cut. \u015ei dac\u0103 nu era destul, a f\u0103cut rost de la nu \u015ftiu cine, de “Via\u0163a roman\u0163at\u0103 a curtezanelor”. Domnule, cartea asta este o adev\u0103rat\u0103 nenorocire. P\u0103i ce, eu mai sunt la v\u00e2rsta aventurilor? Ca s\u0103 nu mai spun c\u0103 autorul exagereaz\u0103 mult, dar \u00eencearc\u0103 \u00a0s\u0103-i explici asta Matildei. A\u015fa c\u0103 de asta am venit, am v\u0103zut-o cu ni\u015fte c\u0103r\u0163i, \u015ftiam c\u0103 a fost la voi \u015fi vreau s\u0103 \u015ftiu la ce s\u0103 m\u0103 a\u015ftept.<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– Cred, am r\u0103spuns, c\u0103 nu e nici un pericol. Un volum e \u00a0“Cucerirea Everestului”, cel\u0103lalt se cheam\u0103 “Cu pluta pe Orinoco”.<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– Pe unde vine asta, Orinico?<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0– Prin America de sud… Dar ce-ai p\u0103\u0163it, domnu’ Leopold? D\u0103-o \u00eencolo de treab\u0103, ce faci matale \u00eentre fotolii? Respir\u0103 ad\u00e2nc, a\u015fa, ridic\u0103-te u\u015furel, \u00eendat\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i aduc un pahar cu ap\u0103 rece… Rece de tot!<\/p>\n

\n

 <\/p>\n

Dr. DOREL SCHOR<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0Tel Aviv, Israel<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0 –\u00a0 schi\u021b\u0103 umoristic\u0103 –   \u00a0 \u00a0Cu toate c\u0103 Leopold Gurni\u015ft e un om foate simpatic, discu\u0163iile noastre sunt [&hellip<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-23913","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-articole"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23913","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=23913"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23913\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":23916,"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23913\/revisions\/23916"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=23913"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=23913"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=23913"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}