{"id":34537,"date":"2018-01-04T07:34:57","date_gmt":"2018-01-04T07:34:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/?p=34537"},"modified":"2018-01-04T07:35:36","modified_gmt":"2018-01-04T07:35:36","slug":"dorel-schor-schite-umoristice-116-fat-frumos-si-fecioara-cu-parul-de-aur","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/2018\/01\/04\/dorel-schor-schite-umoristice-116-fat-frumos-si-fecioara-cu-parul-de-aur\/","title":{"rendered":"Dorel SCHOR: Schi\u021be umoristice (116) – F\u0103t Frumos \u0219i fecioara cu p\u0103rul de aur"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Mai zilele trecute, l-am \u00eent\u00e2lnit pe F\u0103t Frumos. Ar\u0103ta ca \u00eentotdeauna bine, era prezentabil, proasp\u0103t b\u0103rbierit \u015fi mirosea after shave de calitate. P\u0103rea \u00eens\u0103 u\u015for blazat \u015fi lipsit de entuziasmul de alt\u0103dat\u0103… Ne-am a\u015fezat la una din acele m\u0103su\u0163e cu vedere la strad\u0103 pe care cafenelele le pun la dispozi\u0163ia clien\u0163ilor negr\u0103bi\u0163i \u015fi ne-am interesat fiecare de soarta celuilalt.<\/p>\n

– Tot acolo lucrezi? Ce mai e nou? l-am \u00eentrebat.<\/p>\n

– Tot acolo, a confirmat prietenul meu. De\u015fi…<\/p>\n

Un gest de lehamite a completat fraza r\u0103mas\u0103 \u00een aer.<\/p>\n

– E leafa mic\u0103? am tatonat. Necazuri cu bosul? Nu promovezi?<\/p>\n

– Nimic din toate astea… Mai bine ascult\u0103. \u00centr-o zi m\u0103 cheam\u0103 la el Bleumarin \u00cemp\u0103rat, \u015feful meu, \u015fi-mi spune: \u201eA\u015f vrea s\u0103 mi-o aduci pe fecioara cu p\u0103rul de aur, am de g\u00e2nd s-o numesc responsabil\u0103 cu public relations<\/em>…\u201d De bun\u0103 seam\u0103, am r\u0103spuns, plec \u00eendat\u0103 \u015fi nu m\u0103 \u00eentorc f\u0103r\u0103 ea!\u00a0 Am \u00eenc\u0103lecat pe murgul meu cel n\u0103zdr\u0103van \u015fi tocmai \u00eei d\u0103deam adresa c\u00e2nd, afl\u00e2nd care ne e misiunea, calul mi-a zis:<\/p>\n

– Numai atunci o vom g\u0103si pe fecioara asta, c\u00e2nd vom avea pas\u0103rea de aur. Dar aceasta se afl\u0103 la Verde \u00cemp\u0103rat.<\/p>\n

– S\u0103 pornim \u00eentr-acolo, am spus cu entuziasm.<\/p>\n

– Ba mai \u00eent\u00e2i trebuie s\u0103 ajungem la \u00cemp\u0103ratul Violet, c\u0103 doar el are colivia de aur f\u0103r\u0103 de care nu putem duce pas\u0103rea asta special\u0103…<\/p>\n

Nu am pentru Violet \u00cemp\u0103rat o mare simpatie. \u015etii c\u0103 e c\u00e2rcota\u015f \u015fi tipicar, c\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i scoate sufletul cu un milion de \u00eentreb\u0103ri lipsite de rost. Dar slujba-i slujb\u0103, a\u015fa c\u0103 i-am sus c\u0103lu\u0163ului s\u0103 mergem la el.<\/p>\n

– Nu-i destul, a gr\u0103it murgul. Ca s\u0103 po\u0163i deschide colivia asta cu aer condi\u0163ionat \u00ee\u0163i trebuie cheia de aur, care se afl\u0103 la Galben \u00cemp\u0103rat.<\/p>\n

– Atunci du-m\u0103 la acesta, am spus cu jum\u0103tate de gur\u0103.<\/p>\n

– \u015etii cine-i individul? Un ro\u015fcovan b\u0103tr\u00e2n care a fost director de \u015fcoal\u0103 \u015fi c\u00e2nd te prinde nu se las\u0103 p\u00e2n\u00e2 nu te \u00eenva\u0163\u0103 matematici superioare.<\/p>\n

I-am spus totu\u015fi calului s\u0103 m\u0103 duc\u0103 la el.<\/p>\n

– Te-oi duce, a nechezat credinciosul meu c\u0103lu\u0163. Dar nu ai s\u0103 prime\u015fti cheia f\u0103r\u0103 semn\u0103tura lui Rozbombon \u00cemp\u0103rat, care e gestionar. La \u0103sta trebuie s\u0103 a\u015ftep\u0163i un trimestru p\u00e2n\u0103 te prime\u015fte \u00een audien\u0163\u0103 \u015fi abia atunci descoperi c\u0103-\u0163i lipse\u015fte nu \u015ftiu ce adeverin\u0163\u0103 de aur, sau stampil\u0103 de argint, sau paraf\u0103 de platin\u0103, sau semn\u0103tur\u0103 de aram\u0103…<\/p>\n

– O clip\u0103, l-am \u00eentrerupt eu pe F\u0103t Frumos. A\u015fa nu mai termini niciodat\u0103. Cum naiba te-ai descurcat?<\/p>\n

– Cine spune c\u0103 m-am descurcat? soarbe F.F. din cafeaua care s-a cam r\u0103cit. Nu numai c\u0103 nu m-am descurcat, dar nici nu mai am dorin\u0163a s\u0103 reu\u015fesc. Pur \u015fi simplu m-am l\u0103murit de ce nu merg treburile la noi. Pentru c\u0103 nu exist\u0103 o just\u0103 coordonare \u00eentre sectoare…<\/p>\n

– \u015ei \u015feful, Bleumarin \u00cemp\u0103rat nu se sup\u0103r\u0103?<\/p>\n

– \u00cei prezint regulat rapoarte de activitate, d\u0103ri de seam\u0103, note de cheltuieli, propuneri constructive. La urma urmei, face \u015fi el parte din sistem, de ce s-ar sup\u0103ra? \u015ei tot a\u015fa…, mergem \u00eenainte!<\/p>\n

———————-<\/strong><\/p>\n

Dorel SCHOR<\/strong><\/p>\n

Tel Aviv, Israel<\/strong><\/p>\n

1 Ianuarie 2017<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Mai zilele trecute, l-am \u00eent\u00e2lnit pe F\u0103t Frumos. Ar\u0103ta ca \u00eentotdeauna bine, era prezentabil, proasp\u0103t b\u0103rbierit \u015fi mirosea after shave [&hellip<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-34537","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-articole"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/34537","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=34537"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/34537\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":34540,"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/34537\/revisions\/34540"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=34537"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=34537"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marianagurza.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=34537"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}